Had some weird dreams last night and the night before. Those were those kind of dreams which follow you the whole day and leave you lost in daily things.
I dreamed that I was raped and then pregnant of that violator. Noone believed me that I was raped. That was the most awful thing for me. Everybody thought that I was guilty with fornicating.
Last night I dreamed of a woman who slept with someone who is HIV-positiv. I screamed at that woman that she needs to go for medical help and go to the doctor to check if she's now also ill with HIV. That she has a responsibility to the next persons she's going to have sex with and towards people living together with her, so that she won't infect other people with that disease.
She doesn't want to go to the doctor.
I was in such a huge rage because of that.
Then I woke up.
The planned training camp in January on the canary islands is canceled.
I'm sad.
Haven't heard anything of my doctor and the blood value yet.
My serotonin level is lowest low. That's what we found out. But I guess that would be the most possible thing, as I am nearly almost every day kind of melancholy, depressed and in a bad mood. I have to take the precursor of serotonin. There's no improvement since I take those pills. Sad, as they are very expensive and I have to pay them by myself.
But my TSH-level is in normal range for the last 2 weeks - at least. My training is going well since then. Only 2 and a half weeks until the 70.3 race.
4:10 pm - July 27, 2010
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Das kannste schon so machen, aber dann ist es halt Kacke - April 08, 2019
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